Life is a game and then you die. Make the most of it.

2014 Will be the best year of my life….

In 2014 I will


  1. Make over 100k.
  2. Put 20k in 1.)  Savings. and 20k in 2.) investments
  3. weigh 220 with 7% bf.
  4. Prepare my affairs to be ready for lift off in 2015.
  5. See as much of California I can on my bike and document everything.
  6. Self publish at least 3 and as many as 6 books.
  7. Read 12 books, deadline of 1 per month.
  8. Visit Maui for 2 weeks before during and after the leagues fantasy draft. I’m sick of teleconferencing in. (this might have to become a Sploosh tradition.)

Those are just the first 8 things that popped in my head so far. I’ll update as required.


***What’s below is just the random tangents my mind went on while I was thinking of afformentioned goals. The last month or so I would have saved this as a draft because i thought i wasn’t polished enough or whatever bs that means. tonight i’m faded around a [6] so fuck it i’m posting it up. If you don’t like it. Go call the wamulance. 876-waa-aaaa. I don’t give a shit. 




I have no fucking clue about investing right now. But there’s no point in learning yet. I’ll wait till I have money to pull the trigger. Learn while you do. On the job. Men have evolved by being taught on the job. Think about the cavemen. They didn’t have HR meetings and Being A Man 101. They taught their sons how to survive or they dead. You are on earth because your fathers fathers fathers going back MILLIONS of years, fucked a woman in her tight, wet pussy, came inside of her (or not?) and she had a son. They were taught that from their fathers or THEY DIDN’T SURVIVE. Think about that for a second. Not counting the last 100,000 or so years of civilization.  For MILLIONS (link here to exact age of humans.) If you were a little sally bitch, you fucking died. but now everyone has to be all politically correct. so your witty bitty feel feels don’t get hurt.


But I will learn about investing and how to get the most out of making my money work for me.


Fuck equality.

Men and women are different

I’m not saying one is better than the other. Each has it’s strengths and weakness. BUT WE’RE ON THE SAME FUCKING TEAM.

Feminist’s like to think that men are the enemy. The scream PATRIARCHY at the top of their jowl’s. But the hot girls know how to play on the men’s team. AND THEY REAP THE REWARDS. How many disgusting fat slobs are getting the royal treatment from the top of the top men. SHOW ME ONE PLEASE YOU FUCKING FATTIES.  The one’s who know how to stay skinny and hot are getting to live in mansions. While you live in a one bed apart with your 3 cats, your twice a week “girls night” happy hour where you passive aggressively try to one up everyone around with your “strong and independent” personality. Your sense of humor is limited to sarcasm filled with language that’d make a sailor blush.


Instead of being sweet, skinny and sexy. They chose to be fat, foul and fuggly.


Anyone can get in shape. I lost 35 lbs in 6 months. Without counting a single calorie. With 45 minutes of exercise a day. JUST STOP EATING SO MUCH.

Stoked I started juicing. You should try it. I’ve been reading about it for too long. decided to try it out. I made one with spinach, kale, carrots, half a cucumber, frozen blueberries (which don’t even give any juice if they’re frozen….. i think) and a splash of pineapple orange banana juice ( i put it in with the pulp in a magic bullet to blend. then through the juicer again. I thought I was wasting a lot of pulp. it didn’t give me that much more juice so i didn’t do it tonight)

but then i also hamsterized munchies by saying it was Sunday and I’d start fresh on Monday. Bad choice. I had half a digorno pizza, like 20 mini reese’s cups, a roritos’s cool ranch taco and nachos supreme from taco bell. My dad offered and I couldn’t say no. idiot.


When i went to bed around 8 i weighed 212 lbs. that was a 12 lb gain from the last 4 days including thanksgiving.

I had heartburn like a mofo but only after i was woken up. I had went to sleep around 830. K got over around 1230 it hit me like a ton of bricks. You know those times when you feel bloated to the point that a nice deep burp would make it all feel better? well i had that times 100. Couldn’t get it out. I was ripping some good burps too. Just always felt like there was still some holding back.


Long story short.


I was up till 3 getting it all out.


this morning I decided to wait till i got home to juice again and really flush me out. At 1130am i was on the phone when the feeling hit me. I was for sure going to throw up soon. 100% not a doubt in my mind. I thought about going upstairs in my trash can. bathroom? nah fuck it ill go outside.


Walk around the side of the front day past the windows and upchuck all the orange mango sparkling water i’d been drinking all morning.


So today I had 3 carrots, 3 sweet peppers, a shit load of kale and spinach and a fuji apple. The apple gave me the most juice. I’m going to use more of them from now on. I fucking love fuji apples.

I just juiced again because I had the munchies. I did 2 apples. 2 carrots and half a cucumber. Yield of about 22 ounces. I’m going to drink 12-15 or so so I can take my first shot of apple cider vinegar with it. I’ve heard the talk. Time to walk the walk. Then I’ll make more for lunch tomorrow. Boom.

Holy shit that was delicious. I’m sold. Completely satisfied my munchies. Made extra for lunch and it filled my nalgene perfectly


Ook i’m done for reals this time. Coming soon might be some coherently thought out posts. This was fun.


Sploosh out.









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